


Can Anybody?

by MysticallyGallavich



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: :), Gallavich, Heartbreak, Love, M/M, Oneshot, Post S3, prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:02:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22175242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MysticallyGallavich/pseuds/MysticallyGallavich
Summary: PROMPT: I love all your work and can’t wait to read what you post next. I have a prompt.  What if after Mickey breaks Ian’s heart at the end of season 3, he doesn’t not leave but now believes he is only good enough for sex and nobody will ever love him.  He then ends up having a lot of meaningless sex with many random guys since he believes that’s all he’ll ever get. You can decide if Ian is bipolar. Mickey realizes if he wants Ian for himself than he is going have to work to show that he’s serious.
Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich, Lip Gallagher/Mandy Milkovich
Comments: 3
Kudos: 55





	Can Anybody?

**Author's Note:**

> Finally, my last prompt! (unless its one's that were turned into multi chapters) 
> 
> From today forward, I will be finishing all the multi chapters I have going until they are done. (plus one New one, cant not do an after prison one right?) :) 
> 
> keep a lookout for the first chapter of that soon. 
> 
> Much love to all of you.

Ian sat on the curb looking back at the club he had just stumbled out of…again. He was a little tired, and not even a little bit drunk this time. Checking his phone casually waiting for the annoying ass Uber driver to show up and take him the fuck home. He shook his head thinking that it was time to stop all this shit. It had been years of drowning his sorrows over the biggest loss of his life. It was time to move on…and not to other dick…he had done that. A little too often in fact, no. Not that but whatever brand of moving on that didn’t include him being stuck outside some random twink club at 3 in the morning feeling even worse about himself and his situation.

_It's been three years Ian, let it the fuck go. Let him go._

He shook his head at his mind berating him and got up when he saw the car pull up. Time to go the fuck home. And for the first time in a long fucking time. Alone. Alone is how he was anyway. No amount of shots and hookups could change that and he had had his fucking share of hookups since…Since Mickey. He shook his head the same instance that the name entered his mind. He had been doing such a good job lately of not thinking that name. He sure as fuck refused to speak it out loud. Not even to his best friend when she called. She had learned after the first six months not to speak of her brother. It was kind of hard not to learn, seeing as how every time she mentioned his name, she got hung up on. Irrational? Yes. But it didn’t matter. He couldn’t afford to sit around contemplating what went wrong with Mickey because he already knew. He always had known.

Mickey was never going to be that guy. He was southside threw and threw, which meant, that there were things he expected of himself. Being openly gay and in a relationship with the likes of Ian Gallagher. Not really on his to-do list. He knew that he had always known. But knowing it and watching Mickey get fucking married to some Russian whore….just to save face, that had done him in. He had done a lot of stupid asinine things since that moment when he walked out of Mickey’s house after that wedding. The drunken hookups probably didn’t even remotely enter the top three. He could sit and blame everything on circumstances out of his control.

He was after all the only Gallagher lucky enough to be saddled with his mother's illness. He had been flailing for a long time, refusing to believe it. He still didn’t say it out loud, he didn’t take his fucking take his meds over half the time, until recently. A few weeks at most. Those fuckin’ bottled had stared at him from his bathroom cabinet for months, he hadn’t broken, until the night he had been sitting in his bathroom crying like a fucking child and screaming for a person he could and would never have again. It was at that moment that he had decided enough was enough. He was never going to let the past go if he couldn’t get his shit together, so that is what he was going to do. He grunted as he unlocked his apartment and slammed the door. He heard the gasp from inside the apartment and rolled his eyes.

“Cover your fucking selves,” He said already knowing. There were only two people with the key to his apartment. His brother and his best friend. Coincidentally he knew it would be both of them setting on his couch making out like teenagers. For the life of him, he couldn’t figure out why it was so hard for them to get their shit together. But whatever. If they thought them sneaking around was fooling anybody…they were worse than he had been believing he ever had a future with Mickey.

Mickey looked up from his place on the couch when his sister sways and crashes through the door. She’s drunk…Again. Which means shes coming home from one of her classic “Love/Hate sex fests with Phillip Gallagher” He rolled his eyes, pretending not to care. Not to care that his sister was so obviously in love with that idiot who kept jacking her around. Pretending not to care that when she went over there she saw Ian…Ian who he had almost loved, Ian who he had run away from, Ian whose heart he knew he had broken. Still, he sat pretending not to care. Pretending that his sister didn’t know about it all by now. He knew she did, but she didn’t say anything and he didn’t either. It was a hell of a lot of pretending in this house these days.

Mandy collapsed on the couch beside him and Mickey looked up at her to see if she was hurt or if something happened other than her drunken hook-up. Besides looking a little frustrated she seemed fine. So he just rolled his eyes and spoke. “What? Dipshit couldn’t get it up for you tonight?”. He knew he was being an ass but it was their thing. They fought with each other but he knew they would fight for each other as well if they ever needed to. That was all that mattered wasn’t it.

“Well if your boyfriend hadn’t come home early from his hookup….I mean…I’m going to bed.” She sighed and slowly swayed as she got up and he stopped her. She was drunk as fuck so he wouldn’t fault her for her comment about Ian being his. He had also given up the right to call him anything or even care who he was banging, but still, he did. 

“Mands…” He said slowly and she shook her head.

“I’m sorry alright. I’m wasted, I know we are both pretending…it doesn’t matter ok. I was annoyed because I didn’t get laid. It’s not a big deal” He nodded at her. 

“Not mad about shit Mandy. I know you know about that shit. It’s in the past aight?” She looked at him warily and rolled her eyes.

“Like your marriage is?” she inquired. And he shook his head.

“You didn’t tell anybody about that shit right?” he asked. He didn’t need anyone knowing anything. He didn’t need anyone knowing that after two years of surviving that marriage that was hell on earth he had finally grown the balls to end it. Nobody knew that though. Not really. He was struggling enough with it himself. Not ending the sham of a marriage but what it meant for him. He would never again hide away from all the bullshit but he chose to ignore it. There was nothing different he told himself. A million men get divorced every day, A million men have children they only get to see every so often. Nothing had changed, except it had. When he had told her he was done, she had laughed at him, threatened him, trying to get him to still provide for her and their son. He didn’t take the bait however, he told her to go tell his old man, go fucking tell him, he had shouted at her, no longer caring. There was nothing to care about. He had given up the only person he needed to keep safe from that prick father of his. What else was he going to do, come and kill him…he didn’t give a shit about that really all that much.

“He will kill you.” She said slowly as she started to realize her threats would not make a difference any longer. “You just give up son, no care for that carrot dick?” she had continued talking and asking.

“Aint nothing got shit to do with him. That shit is done. DONE. I will provide for my son. And you, in turn, will take him far away from here, where Terry cant get to him. I will come see him, I will protect him and you. I can’t do this anymore, I can’t live like this anymore.” He said it and she nodded. He knew she would, as long as her son was cared for and safe she wasn’t that big of a bitch. She was still a bitch, just not as big of one as he had initially thought. Then again he supposed he would be a raging bitch too if his father had sold him into sex slavery. What he had done in his life was bad enough. He couldn’t imagine having her life. So that was it. Except that it wasn’t, he didn’t want that shit going around. He didn’t want the news to get back to Terry any sooner than it needed to.

  
  
  


“No. Of course, I didn’t say anything Mickey. You should though. They wouldn’t tell anyone.” She looked at him pleading. Saying something with her eyes that he refused to see. It wasn’t going to go like that. It wasn’t. What he had was gone, the dreams of what it could be, gone. He shook his head and walked past her into his room. He had had enough for the night.

Ian woke up to his alarm. An alarm he wanted to smash into a billion little pieces. He didn’t, he got up took out the bottles that he had promised himself to open today, and sat them on his side table before slowly making his way into his kitchen to make some toast. This was it, this was where it all began or rather this time this is where he accepted that this was just a part of who he was now.

In that vulnerable moment, he let himself think of Mickey. To be thankful that Mickcy left him and never had to see this side of him. That he never had to see the version of himself that he had become.

Ian let those thoughts into his head and just as fast he pushed them out and swallowed down the meds that he hated.

\--

Mickey stumbled out of his room a little earlier than usual. He called Svet and checked on his boy and made himself breakfast and was out the door.

He tried to stop himself from going into the shop Lip worked at, he really did. He should have but as much as he wanted to kill his sister 99.9 percent of the time, he still loved her, he still wanted to protect her and to do that he had to do this.

HE watched as Phillip Gallagher looked up from his bike in front of him, he let out a low, annoying as fuck whistle causing Mickey to roll his eyes.

“What do we have here?” Lip cockily asked him. Why his sister liked this fuck was beyond him.

“What we have Gallagher, is me telling you to stop with the bullshit before I stick my fist down your throat.”

“Man and here I thought you’d rather have Dick down your throat than a fist.” Mickey clinched his fist but something stopped him. The door chimed and Lip’s face changed from cocky to pale. He froze, he knew by the heat radiating off his back who had walked in. He couldn’t turn around yet, he wouldn’t be able to keep his shit together. He closed his eyes when he heard Ian’s deep voice speak. He knew Lip could see what this was doing to him. He was just praying he didn’t say anything in front of Ian, at least while he was still standing here. 

“What’s going on here?” Ian asked talking to his brother but Mickey knew his eyes were on him. He could feel them. He turned slightly, he needed to take him in. He looked great except for in his eyes, they were pulled, pained. He had done that. Ian had always been a bright soaring light. The stab to his chest hurt. He turned back to Lip.

“Just stop hurting my sister douchebag. Either love her or let her go. He said turning to walk out.

“Gallagher.” He acknowledged.

“Mickey,” Ian whispered and it did something to him, so much so that he couldn’t help but let his hand touch Ian ass he passed.

“Lookin’ good Gallagher.” It’s not what he wanted to say but he couldn't say any of those things now. It was too late for those things.

“Like you hurt him?” Lip called but he kept walking. That was different. Wasn’t it?

\--

“Really?” Ian asked his brother. He didn’t have time to deal with the emotions being stirred up inside him right now.

“What? The dick comes in here itching for a fight. What I do with Mandy is none of his damn business.” Lip grunted.

“Lip…He’s not wrong.” Ian sighed as Lip glared at him. “She loves you, shes always loved you. If it's back enough for Mickey to come over here, when he pretends he doesn’t give a shit about her, it’s serious. So fucking decide if you want her or not” 

He didn’t wait for Lip to respond, he just walked to the door. “and by the way, my apartment is off-limits for a couple of days. I’ll be home on an adjustment, I need quiet.” He said leaving. Lip tried to call after him but he didn’t have the time or the energy to deal with it.

“What do you mean?” Mickey yelled at his sister.

“I just need you to bring the food in, drop it off and leave. I’m busy at work and I promised.” There was no way in hell he was going over there to Ian’s to deliver food.

“Send Lip….or tell him to get off his ass and get it himself.” He barked.

“He can’t. He’ll be in bed, just do it. You owe him.” She yelled and he wanted to argue but she wasn’t wrong so he stupidly agreed.

\--

Ian heard the door open and close. Knowing mandy was bringing over some food for him was awesome. He had tried to tell her he was fine. That his meds were evened pout, he could get his own food but she never listened. He was walking out of the bathroom in a towel as he talked.

“Thanks a bunch, Mands, but I told you I’m good, meds are good. Noring to worr….Mickey?!”

Mickey stared at his ex…whateer they had been, He wanted that towel to fall. It had been years, but something registered bringing him out of his fantasy of Ian naked…

“Meds?” was something wrong with Ian? Is that why mandy was so dominant about the food?

“Yeah. Mandy sent you?” Ian being Ian asked the obvious.

“Why Meds?” He asked again, as he sat the food on the table.

“I’m good. Thanks for the food. I told her I’m fine.”

Ian was trying to keep a level facial expression but Mickey wasn’t having any of it. He walked toward Ian until Ian was against the wall.

“Meds? You’re sick?” He was suddenly terrified. He had given Ian up, yes, but he, no the world couldn’t lose him. This reaction wasn’t logical, he knew that he did, people took medication for various things, but Mandy had been freaked earlier.

“Mickey…calm down. I’m fine. I’m not that kind of sick ok? Come on Breathe.” But Mickey couldn’t, Ian was fine, ok but he wasn’t. He needed to feel him so he pulled Ian by his waist, and kissed him hard. No hesitation.

“Mickey. I can’t…do this.” Ian was pleading, which meant he felt it too. After all, these years he felt it still and he could just make him want to…he already did. Instead, he backed up and looked into those eyes. He stared him down and spoke.

“Ian Gallagher. I love you. I still love you.: he said it, after years of denying why all of this had hurt so damn much. He didn’t expect anything but it had to be said and he backed up before he couldn’t control himself any longer.

“You…Love me?” Ian asked a flash his mickey like a ton of bricks.

“and I’m Gay.” He knew it hit Ian too. That day, what he had done.

“Your wife know that?” Ian jabbed, but Mickey could hear the pain was still there.

“My ex-wife is a lesbian, or whatever. I doubt she gives a shit who or what I like as long as I send the checks at this point.”

Somehow something had changed in Ian suddenly.

“Divorced?”

“Yup.”

“why?”

“Because I’m gay, and in love with an annoying ginger.” There it was at that moment, Mickey had let it all lay out there. He had nothing left. Terry was the only reason for hiding and he was locked up for life by now.

“You love me?” Ian asked again.

“Yes, you idiot. I love you. Now that I’ done making an ass of myself. Enjoy your food.” Mickey turned and started to walk away there wasn’t much more that he could take.

Ian grabbed him and pulled him back. “You think you can give me everything I ever wanted and just leave?” he didn’t wait for an answer, he kissed Mickey, he grabbed his hand and neither Mickey or Ian was heard from until three days later when they had to go to work.

**Author's Note:**

> next up: New Fic followed up updates for all current unfinished fics. 
> 
> Still not taking any requests for the time being. 
> 
> MUCH LOVE 
> 
> EDITS will also be started back up soon.


End file.
